I am not settled into summer. There are a few reasons, a different schedule having the kids home, dealing with new pains, the weather, and nervous about job stuff for my husband. Yet somehow, I am able to really enjoy my family. Grateful for each trouble being paired with a benefit. The old Cat Stevens song, "Moonshadow" is my mantra....
--If I ever loose my hands, I won't have to work no more.
--If I ever loose my eyes, I won't have to cry no more.
--If I ever loose my legs I won't moan and I won't beg, I won't have to walk no more.
--If I ever loose my mouth all my teeth north and south, I won't have talk no more.
It is such a happy easy going lil' tune! I can't help but take a deep peaceful breath when listening to it!
But in the midst of the good is confusion on how to adapt to these schedule and pain changes while still trying to maintain my rigorous healing schedule. Honestly, most of my healing tasks get a bit boring and annoying! They are not fun. So most of me doesn't want to do them. But then there is that small but mighty part of me that remembers the big reasons of why to heal: My Family & the Me that is inside me.
So I am left in limbo....feeling like I am in school again procrastinating on my homework. Not quite able to fully relax into any moment because there is much to do. One item I have been avoiding is meal planning/shopping/cooking for myself. That task feels quite burdensome lately and hopefully soon I can brake it down into something smaller. I know food can be an amazing healing medicine. In the meantime, thankfully I have freezer meals that Tim did for me for mother's day and my birthday.
I will just allow myself to be in this unsettled place and float along through it enjoying the fun scenery along the way. (Right now my son and 2 of his friends are playing wii and making fun happy noises! It puts a smile on my face too!)
--If I ever loose my hands, I won't have to work no more.
--If I ever loose my eyes, I won't have to cry no more.
--If I ever loose my legs I won't moan and I won't beg, I won't have to walk no more.
--If I ever loose my mouth all my teeth north and south, I won't have talk no more.
It is such a happy easy going lil' tune! I can't help but take a deep peaceful breath when listening to it!
But in the midst of the good is confusion on how to adapt to these schedule and pain changes while still trying to maintain my rigorous healing schedule. Honestly, most of my healing tasks get a bit boring and annoying! They are not fun. So most of me doesn't want to do them. But then there is that small but mighty part of me that remembers the big reasons of why to heal: My Family & the Me that is inside me.
So I am left in limbo....feeling like I am in school again procrastinating on my homework. Not quite able to fully relax into any moment because there is much to do. One item I have been avoiding is meal planning/shopping/cooking for myself. That task feels quite burdensome lately and hopefully soon I can brake it down into something smaller. I know food can be an amazing healing medicine. In the meantime, thankfully I have freezer meals that Tim did for me for mother's day and my birthday.
I will just allow myself to be in this unsettled place and float along through it enjoying the fun scenery along the way. (Right now my son and 2 of his friends are playing wii and making fun happy noises! It puts a smile on my face too!)
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